looking back

funny how that works...

no matter how hard we try to look ahead, we still find ourselves looking back.

i am everything you would ever need. you were just too arrogant to notice.

haha

my new favorite tshirt! thought i'd share... haha

hope you're all having a fantastic week! happy tuesday :)

the next thing

life is funny...

one day you're just going along in one direction and the next thing you know someone sweet is bringing you roses.

people ask me

people ask me all the time why i'm single. i'm cute, i'm fun to be around, i cook, i take good care of the kidlets, i'm family oriented and i work hard. apparently these things are attractive.

my only answer is that i have high standards and shrug at them. i date, i meet new people all the time, but there just isn't the connection. maybe it's that i'm not enough drama or prissy and girly and helpless? i have no idea.
there are plenty of guys that are smitten, but I guess if i'm that intimidating to ones that i'm actually attracted to, i don't want that anyway.

where

if you want to know where your heart is, look where your mind goes when it wanders.

the dress

well, my darlings, here it is! the dress!
the gloves are soft pink and the shawl was bought at an auction. i'm told it was once owned by debbie reynolds. you can't see my pearl bracelet or my sapphire earrings, but they're there.

buying this gown was a nightmare, but only because buying anything formal off the rack isn't ideal when you're shaped more like an hourglass than a stick. this i had forgotten from so many years past. i used to buy them 2 sizes too big and have the waist and hips taken in. i chose this one, because it was a corset and could be cinched in.

in case you ever wondered, this is the lifestyle that i grew up in. formal gowns at least 4, but probably 6 or more times a year. this is part of the life of quiet smiles and obligation that i so quickly ran away from when i married at 19. and am now stepping ever so hesitantly back into.

anyway, the marine corps ball was a total blast! celebrating the 237th birthday of the u.s. marine corps was a pretty unique experience. i had a lot of fun with my boys.

my boys, that's what i call them. guys that i grew up with that treat me like their little sister. i really like that i have friends like that. they understand that friendships aren't always cut and dried and that relationships are never just black and white. my boys respect me and are always instinctively trying to protect me and they would drop what they were doing to help me if i needed it. it all fits together in that little sister package.

i think i missed that in tn. i missed being able to really trust people. it is getting easier to let my guard down a bit more with so much family and old friends around. letting my guard down isn't always a good thing, but i'm always learning and growing.

belief

i posted this on the 10th of oct, but i took it down because it hurt too much to leave it. now, i guess it doesn't matter.

i want so badly to believe that these old words spoken with new breath are true. i want to believe that this isn't fleeting. i want to believe that you weren't just caught up in the moment. i want to believe that i am what you want.

the important things are worth fighting for. you are worth fighting for.