Friday, May 7, 2010

flashing gang signs

did you know that you have to empty the hot chocolate packet INTO the cup and then add water?? apparently my brain didn't engage that today... i got hot water and the packet just sat there on the counter. it was great!

i had a moment last night where, if i was actually looking at the words that i was hearing, i so would have done a double take... and not in a good way. i would have been shooting them dirty looks and flashing them gang sign.

things are not how i want them. not that i know how i want them to be RIGHT NOW... i know the direction that i want to travel. i have a vague idea of how i think things should end. i'm just not sure how i'm going to get there. on a boat, in a canoe, on foot, doing cartwheels... i have no clue.
i want to keep moving, but sometimes i think that i'm moving further away from the things that i want. i don't want to just stand still, because i'm afraid of either stagnating or getting run over. does that mean i should go faster or slower? or change directions?
to be honest, i kinda want to crawl under a rock for a bit. can i do that?? that's standing still isn't it??


yay anxiety and conflict!! you rock! thanks for f*ckin with my head!!

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